


The Dari-urge

by Blake C Stacey (BlakeStacey)



Category: Aeon Flux (Cartoon), Daria (Cartoon)
Genre: Gen, Metafiction, Vignette
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-21
Updated: 2018-06-21
Packaged: 2019-05-26 14:32:24
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 282
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15002873
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlakeStacey/pseuds/Blake%20C%20Stacey
Summary: In reaction to MTV's announcement that they are rebooting some properties from bygone days, a brief notice from the old crew.





	The Dari-urge

_Scene: an abandoned industrial space converted into a coffee shop. DARIA MORGENDORFFER enters riding a skateboard and bumps awkwardly into the table where the milk and other additives are kept._

DARIA: How do you do, fellow Millennials? As you may have heard, the so-called _[finger quotes]_ "Music Television Network" is bringing back several of its hits from the '90s. And that includes us!

_[JODIE LANDON steps out from behind a curtain.]_

JODIE: That's right! MTV is rebooting _Daria,_ the show that taught '90s teens messages of detachment and irony, like "books are fun to read".

DARIA: And "attend PTA meetings and voice your valid concerns to your school superintendent".

JODIE: And "find a good college that's right for you".

DARIA and JODIE together: You know, cynicism!

DARIA: Now, you may be concerned that Jane Lane, my _[finger quotes again]_ "amiga", was not included in MTV's announcement.

JODIE: But don't worry! There's a very good reason. Due to budget constraints, MTV won't be hiring all of the characters for its other rebooted cartoon property, and Jane will instead be filling in for—

_[Above, there is a great slamming noise, followed by a yelp and the breaking of sugar glass. A woman falls into the coffee shop, catching her stiletto heel in a chair on the way down and overturning a wobbly little two-seater table.]_

JANE: Oof. I'd call that a B-plus, wouldn't you?

_[DARIA peers over the edge of the upturned table.]_

DARIA: Maybe you should practice while wearing clothes that provide a little more ... protection.

JANE: Oh, you've seen me in worse.

DARIA: Not in canon.

JODIE: _[very chipper]_ See you on a streaming service soon!

_[Cut to MTV Studios logo. Fin.]_

**Author's Note:**

> This is not part of the _[Daria Makes A Deal](https://archiveofourown.org/works/8165015)_ storyline. You can tell, because I posted it promptly. Self-zing!


End file.
